Wholeness

Been thinking more about oneness/wholeness. About past and future and present/presence.
If I feel desolate sometimes these days, I didn´t before, and won´t always.
I was electric, proud, hopeful.

I am still ten years old, grassy soccer knees and unstoppable smile, exhilarant. I am still seventeen, wild hope. I am still twenty that first summer in New Mexico – the whole world changing and opening before my eyes from the tops of ragged mountains. I am still here, newly twenty-three and feeling displaced and emptied but still possible and so grateful to be learning.

Even if now can feel no good, it is still one with what lies ahead and what lay behind.
Nothing is lost or ruined. I still contain that electricity, pride, and hope. That never changed, and never will.
It´s in there, feeding new roots somewhere deep.
Thank God.

Does that make sense? I feel fine.

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Also, we just had an earthquake. Shook is the wrong word. I was sitting here writing this and it felt like I was suddenly in the wave pool and then suddenly not. Everything and everyone is fine, but I feel a little dizzy. Weird.

Also. I love Cat Power lately. Is she out of my league?